Are you Single?..A very straight forward question. I mean, ‘Don’t you have your Valentine?’ Your ans may be ‘yes’ or ‘no’. It doesn’t matter. Does it ? Who cares whether someone has valentine or not? Only if s/he is your crush or you like/love him/her? Isn’t it ? Answer is obviously ‘yes’. Because all these musings are my own after all. All those questions are for me, myself?
This time I don’t know why I want to write this post. But may be because I want to convince myself that I am a ” SIngle Living…….Happy Girl” till date.:-P No matter wat will happen tomm.? I love today. I love the way, how I am living today in case of Love.:-P
Last year was somehow funny for me. Some of my fren thought that I fall for someone for the first time in Life . They sent sms, messsages in fb inbox to congratulate me saying that U r Unbelievable……that u got married?.
Last week one of my fren became angry with me because he thought I got married on last Feb 7. He was angry wid me not because I got married but because he thought I didn’t invite him in the wedding ceremony. And, during chat he asked me in a very wrath manner, “Timro bihe bhayo re ho?” At first I was shocked wid the unexpected question. Then after sometime I replied a fake answer, “Ho ni, but sorry yaar maile bolayina herana testai bhayo, try to understand”. WHen I was telling him so, I really turned red. My +2 fren when got angry inwardly, I diverted the conversation and told “Arey sathi pahila bhetu ani sabai bhanchhu?” And he replied in a way as if boyfren was talking wid his girlfren, ” Bhaihalyo pheri timro buda le marla, aba timilai k bhetirahanu?” Buda……it sounds ridiculous. It make me feel shy.
After that he always ignoring me in facebook. Today also he do the same. I don’t know why but in the last week, many more discussion and happenings were there which always makes me think about marriage. But not about mine. 😛
Seriously on the issue of marriage I am too kid. So with love too. That is why I prefer living single for now.
While writing about Valentine, I am becoming nostalgic with the word “Darling”. When I was reading at grade two, I was about to upgrade the class from two to four. When we all fren were about to get back home in a line outside the school gate, my fren S, don’t know, in which circumstances she kissed me and said,”Hello, Darling.” I was like trembled and nothing could do. SO I cried saying, ‘SUshma told me, Darling’. haha(Laughing at myself):-P :-P….Kid mind. Everytime when I remember that event I always laugh at myself thinking, the most fooooool one. I cried because I thought the word darling can only be pronounced to boyfren/girlfren or husband/wife. Same kind of event happened @ grade seven too.
THere was a boy who loved writing poem. SO did I. We used to share poem. I don’t know whether we were good fren, close fren or wat? But m sure we were not like bf/gf. Because at that grade I don’t know wat love was (even now). During the Dashain time we used to give greetinng cards to our fren and I also gave him greeting card including some poems that I had written. He accepted that very normally. I was waiting for his comment/compliment on those poems. But one of our classmate, G, uproared in the class among girls that we were gf/bf. But the guy don’t know abt that. That uproaring just came in my mind. That day too I cried a lot. And I don’t know how? but my father came to know that I was crying all the way coming back home. I told the truth. I don’t know wat came across my dad’s mind. He told me many things, Mom also convinced me that these type of problems will come in life time and again. I must be strong to fight with that. Honestly, I thought like I was the most bad girl among all others because someone add my name with one guy. Again, my fool immature mind. But I really love those innocence of mine now.:-P
Those words of my parents in a way makes me strong. Though my dad told me, ‘Tyo keta sanga chai timi bolnu hai, pahila ko jastai ramro sathi bannu’ But I didn’t talk with him very sharply for the whole one year. Later he knew why I didn’t talk wid him bhanera. But, may be our understanding was relative he too, was afraid to talk wid me. From class nine we start talking very mildly. After our +2 I joined KU and he went to US. And one night when I was online, he was also there. We talk very normally. He asked me, “timi ajkal pani poem lekhchhau?” I replied, “No”
Yes thesedays too I don’t write poem. Poem writing habit has gone. But I told him that I write articles, feature stories for newspaper. After knowing that he suggested me to read some book by some great writers. I can’t wait thanking him. He is as always a very good boy. My fren, while writing this, I am missing you extremely as a very good fren.
During my +2 and KU days there was not any boyfren hangover. Last month I met my fren of KIST onlin and we talked abt our latest updates. I was kidding wid him abt affair wid a boy. That time I love the line he told about me was, “+2 kai Binita ramri lagthyi, ekdam saral ra mehenati”. Thank you for your compliment my fren. U too are good. Coz as u told u too don’t have gf. Kaso ta?:-P
Between dat wat all these happy single living things in the year 2009 I came to know about a very sucessful lovestory. Actually there are two couples. From both couple I know only one member. From my collegue side D(man) and from my classmate side R. They both are very sure for there sucessful relationaship. I am happy with taht.
Actually I don’t know how one feel when s/he fell in love. Because I haven’t till date. But I felt good, listening to my fren abt their love story when we were coming back from Darjelling in that night. She told me that when anyone fell in love we act, do anything thinking about our beloved that what s/he will think. She said, “Yo sansar nai uskai tarikale sochinchha, uskai tarika le herinchha, yedi maya sacho chha bhane teha ekdam kaam swartha hunchha”. I imagined that kind of love too. But, I haven’t met that kind of man yet. May be because I am not also that kind of girl. Don’t know? And she suggested me on what kind of man should my nature need. But my introverted nature don’t want to reveal that here.
Now, leave all these musings of mine. Think of how to enjoy life as a single person on Valentine’s day. I don’t have any plan to celebrate this day. But, I love today. And because today is a valentine day I love Valentine day. And Valentine day always reminds me this picture I took last year. As this couple, may you all couple have a wonderful valentine date.
Garden of Dreams pic are by Dikshya and ramaining all are by myself.
P.S- I know there are many grammatical mistakes, vocabulary problems, sorry for that. I don’t have habit of writing in english. But when I m freeing my mind and typing all these words coming spontaneously from the past I feel absolutely great.:-P When I finished writing this, there was Karna Das singing “TImro mEro Sambandha ko Artha khojna Kaar lagyo” 😛